How to know if your relationship is bringing you down? Check out these toxic relationship signs and red flags.
No relationship is born perfect, and we all have to do our part to maintain a relationship. But what if someone you love is manipulative or toxic? Should you leave, or should you stay and try harder?
A few months after I broke up with my ex, I dated a guy for a few months. When we first met, I thought he was the sweetest and most caring person on earth. He would call me first thing in the morning and 10+ times during the day. When I couldn’t pick up his phone at work, he would flip and call me “ungrateful” through paragraphs of texts. And he expected me to spend all the weekends with him because I “don’t have friends anyway.” Every time I tried to talk about the pressure he was causing me, he blamed me for “not knowing how to love someone.” And that’s why my ex had left me.
I was lucky enough to have my family and friends who talked me out of the relationship. They were able to tell that Mr. ILoveYouTooMuch was trying to diminish my worth, cut me off from my support network, and manipulate me in the name of love. And after I blocked this guy completely, I could finally breathe freely.
Am I lonely? Yes, a lot of the time. But did I regret my decision? No, absolutely not. Love is not a free pass for cheating, lying, abuse, or manipulation. No amount of effort or compromise would change someone’s toxic personality traits. You are better off alone than sacrificing your inner peace and happiness.
If you wonder whether a relationship is toxic, here is a list of toxic relationship signs that will help you figure out.
Toxic relationship signs to spot and cut off toxic people
You feel the need to please them
When you are in a relationship with toxic people or narcissists, you may feel a strong need to please them. They may attack your appearance, your career, or your personality. They make you feel like you are never enough. And the only way to prove your value is by meeting their expectations.
Toxic relationship sign #2: Lack of respect
Under no circumstances should you feel less worthy in a relationship. Toxic people break your personal boundaries and call that an act of love. They make mean jokes about you and blame you for being too serious. They feel entitled to your time and attention and treat you like a possession.
The truth is, if someone truly cares about you, they won’t do anything intentionally to hurt your feelings. They respect your boundaries instead of violating them. If mutual respect is lacking, it’s time to reconsider if the relationship is worth fighting for.
You have to justify your need
You are not needy for wanting the same level of attention or loyalty you put in a relationship. You are not selfish for needing space for yourself. These are the basics, not a luxury.
However, toxic people blame you for wanting the bare minimums. You feel the need to justify your emotions. And it will always end up being your fault.
You feel better without them
Our mind may need more time to digest what our heart already knows. It’s ok that we need time off in a relationship. But if you feel like you are finally at ease when you are away from them, it says a lot about the tension between you two.
You are left alone when you need support
A dedicated and healthy relationship is inspiring. It gives us the courage to fight against the odds because we are not alone. But a toxic relationship is often one-sided. You are there for them, but they disappear when you need help and support.
Double standards
Toxic people or narcissists never think they are wrong. It’s ok for them to ignore your text for hours. But they blame you for doing the same. They question your loyalty when you spend the night with a coworker. But they call you insecure and emotional when you have the same doubts.
Isolation
A responsible partner will not try to be the sole purpose of your life. He understands a strong social circle is just as important as a romantic relationship.
But toxic people do the opposite. They point fingers at your friends and family, criticizing them for not being supportive. They may even make a scene when you try to hang out with other people. What the toxic people try to do is to build a wall between you and your people. They mess with your mind and trick you into believing that they are all you have.
Everyone thinks that you are too good for them
It’s not always easy to take a step back and observe from a third-person perspective. That’s why what others have been saying all the time could be right. You certainly don’t need others to validate your relationship. But it’s ok to ask what others think, especially if you have been struggling.
I was lucky enough to have a small circle of friends who were willing to tell the truth. They thought I was settling in a toxic relationship just to escape loneliness. I was angry and in denial. But looking back, it was their honesty that helped me quit the toxic relationship.
Read also: 43 Empowering Toxic Relationship Quotes To Leave For Good
What are your experiences with toxic people?
Share your story in the comment. Your words may inspire someone on the other side of the world to walk out of a toxic relationship.
If you feel stuck in an emotionally or physically abusive relationship, seek help at National Domestic Violence Hotline.
in in a toxic relationship my boyfriend calls me names when he doesn’t get it his way. he goes on dating sites behind my back all the time
Hey Donna. Sorry about your current situation. Are you still with him now? Maybe you guys can talk things through and let him know about your frustration. But if he is a total bully, leaving him may be the best choice.
Exactly the same here. He is my ex now. Don’t tolerate that sort of behaviour. If he is with you he should not be on datingsites
Donna please leave him!!! He is a manipulator!!! He will manipulate your life for the rest of your life!!! Get out of this relationship please!!!
You need to look for someone that gives you a push in life and admires you for who you are!! YOU
I am in a toxic marriage. My husband berated me and became angry because I asked him to spend time with us. He left the next day for work and then he sent me at least 80 text messages telling me all the bad things he thinks I am. He talks poorly about my family and tries to keep me away from them. I am at the point where I can’t handle this anymore.
I am in the same toxic marriage you are describing. He always saying negative things about my family and doesn’t want them at our home. Things I do are never good enough….house not cleaned correctly, his clothes need to be ironed better, ect. its always something. It’s never what I have done its always what he says I haven’t done or not done to his standard. I want to leave but not sure how and I know I can’t take this anymore.
Anna,
I hope you set a boundary on what you are willing to accept. if he is unable to respect that you make yourself a priority. Learn about the domestic violence cycle and learn that even baby steps will get you to a healthier you.
Oh Donna I’m so sorry yes sometimes they think the bitches on Instagram or tiktok is the real don’t worry god has. Got Victory coming your 3
Hi Donna I’m Joanne the best option is take your Dignity and stuff and leave don’t answer this jackasses calls change your number
No idea what I was dealing with….did my work and discovered what I’m dealing with..
Have my tools now and goals …to seek peace.
Iam trying to move out of a relationship that become a toxic situation for me that consumes me and emotionally tired I was at the hospital and one of he friends tell him I was in hospital cause I was sick and He didn’t even send me a message I Used to feel safe with him now I feel in danger but I never feel free with him or talks about some tips of things now iam just understanding that if he stressing me instead of blessing and loving me I need to love myself and invest in me!
I have unfortunitely been in quite a few toxic relationships in the past, which makes me feel like I am an expert when it comes to seeing the signs to let me know when or if I may be in one. Right now I don’t think that I’m in one at the present time, but it is still too early in the relationship to really tell if I am in one or not. However, so far I’m pretty sure that I finally got me a keeper this time. But my past last 2 relationships were both really, really toxic. They were so bad, no more like horrible. Each one of those that were listed up above were exactly what those relationships I was in before were like. All of those warning signs were there and then some. They were very physically and verbally abusive. I stayed stuck in one of those abusive relationships for 4 1/2 years without reporting the abuse to the police, until the very end when a witness had seen him choking me and throwing me down to the ground so he called the police and that’s when I finally pressed charges on him and made him pay for assaulting me in public. But that relationship was the hardest for me to leave. My last one was also just as bad. There were way too many lies, abuse, and a lot of cheating on me that happened, so I left him after 8 months of toxnicity and unhealthiness. Look, all toxic relationships are extremely hard to leave. But my advice to anyone who is now in one at the moment is to just LEAVE and to get out as fast as you can and run away from it, AND DON’T LOOK BACK!!! IT WILL NEVER GET ANY BETTER! TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS ARE VERY UNHEALTHY AND DOOMED FROM THE START! SO RUN!!!
Hi Tina, thanks for telling your stories. I personally have mixed feelings reading your comment.
I feel really sorry for what you’ve gone through. Those experiences are reminders that not all relationships are perfect and sometimes they suck.
But I am glad that you’ve moved on and I believe that you are an inspiration for whoever reading this post right now but are still struggling to leave a toxic relationship.
So happy for you:)
this signs i have seen in my relationship . she always blame me without my fault . she leaves everytime when i needed her too much.
I have been ,and still is struggling to save a toxic relationship . I feel very sorry for whoever is experiencing the same thing as I do.. Sometimes you can’t just run away from it right away..and when you do , you feel guilty for not trying the best you could to save it..It is really very hard and difficult. I thank you all for sharing this topic..
Yeah well my guy claims his trying just cause he sticks around..umm come on ..if you dont talk sleep with or next to
kiss, hug eat dinner with or dont watch movie just to name a few are you really trying..
No, he is not trying. He is basically saying, take it or leave it,if you don’t like what I offer move on. He will likely never stop making you feel like he could care less if you come or go. I think you are being starved and you may even feel like, if you finally walked out the door, he’d put no more effort into trying to stop you than he’s put into trying to fulfill you. If you have tried to express your desires for closeness & quality time together and he has persisted to treat you like you should be content with the simple fact that the space around you is partially occupied by a human shape of mute biomass, he is openly conveying his indifference for your needs & takes a lackadaisical attitude with the most significant facet of our existence as human beings. Its time to find someone who is interested in you like you are in them. After all, it sounds like you have nothing left to lose maybe, (at least from him) since he’s refused to give it, you’re already living the life of a person who doesn’t have a relationship, except in this one, someone’s sending you messages on the daily, indicating that you are not worth the effort and are incapable of captivating their attentions. In that situation you are being silently broken down & devalued. That not ok hon.
I have been in two toxic relationship so far. One was a covert narcissist who is the worst human being I have ever encounter and the other was merely abusive. In both relationship the abuse started a fews months into the relationship. For the abusive ex….I usually felt a rush of anxiety whenever I am close to home thinking what mood he would be in. He would give me the silent treatment for no reason at all and if I don’t try to pamper him or beg him to talk to me he would get very angry. When he said something rude or disrespectful and I tell him he is awful he would grab my neck and throat and squeeze my face until it gets swollen. He also wanted me to be his maid and if I don’t attend to his every request at his timing he would get into RAGE. No one would think that of him because he appears to be quiet, humble and a family man. As for my COVERT NARCISSIST , I won’t even go there because if I speak of his ACTS I PROMISE, you will never sleep the same. That was my first experience of what EVIL is. I am not sure if my first ex was a narcissist he was abusive and have alot of anger but I am sure my last ex was a covert narcissist he was way more than abusive, he was EVIL to the point where it looks satanic. It was my first experiencing someone so soulless, cold, zero conscience and emotionally dead. I left them within most after see what hey possess.
Please be careful and don’t ignore the red flags.
Hi Lisa, how did you manage to leave the covert narcissist, or the abusers without getting them mad and taking revenge? I’m in a similar situation only I’m married to mine and worried what will happen if I give him divorce papers? Any advice would be a great help ty
Same here, married with 2 children I feel like it will start a war but I want to be myself again
Hi Rose and Mina. The safest way to take is a separation before attempting to divorce a person who’d not think twice befoe hurting you. .
I have been with a narcissist for 16 years just a year ago I found out thats what he..this is the most intense emotional pain I’ve ever went thru and ill never be the same again..still struggling to get away..thanks Lisa so sorry for your pain but thank you for letting me know its real and trust me its way worse then they warn..miss so bad it right down sounds crazy coming out of my mouth but that’s how clever they are
My husband does it all. I have no choice but to accept it and divert my mind with something productive for me and my daughter. Leaving him is not an option for me. If I had I would have done it long back.
I’m in a toxic relationship that I’m having a hard time getting out of. My fiancé and I live two hours apart which was not a big problem the first 2 years of our relationship, but lately it appears that it now is. My fiancé has reconnected with an old high school boyfriend, that she claims it’s just a good friend now. She is now sitting with his elderly grandmother has a part-time job, on occasion she has to stay overnight. I have discovered that the old high school boyfriend lives with his grandmother. She says she only stays overnight when your boyfriend has to work nights, but I have found out that there’s many nights that she stays here when he is home. She says that her bedroom is on the second floor and his is on the third. Does she think I’m stupid, that neither one of them can walk up or down stairs. There’s times when my fiancé has blocked me from texting or calling and I have found out that those times are when the old boyfriend is around. She has him listed in her phone as “My Bonham”, his last name, and has many pictures of him in her phone, the pictures of me are in a hidden folder in her phone. At one point he listed on his Facebook page that he was in a relationship with her, when I questioned her about it she said it was just for one around. But then she excepted his request and her Facebook showed she was in a relationship with him. When I told her that it hurt me to see that and I asked her to remove it she refused saying it was no big deal. I truly love her a great deal and even though my head says I need to walk away, and my friends say I need to walk away, my heart won’t let me. Am I that big of a fool?
It’s always difficult before you actually leave a toxic relationship.
She is probably manipulating you because she thinks you’ll never leave.
Why not cool things down by not contacting her for some time to see how she reacts. And you’ll have some time to figure things out.
I have been with the cruelest man I have ever met for 2 yrs now, in the beginning he did and said everything right, and like a light switch he just turned into someone I no longer knew. I have left him 3 times and somehow he manages to get me back. I am not a naive or easily fooled, except for him!! I am a very intelligent, strong, independent woman and have been since I was 16 yrs. old…But since enduring the abusive shit from him I have turned into this angry, jealous, & sad person. The feeling of worthlessness and hopelessness is overwhelming most days. I’m stuck in a shitty town with no means, no contacts, isolated, I have not had to depend on a man or person for anything since I was 16y until now and I feel so trapped. I have wanted to leave him for good for a year now, I just don’t know how to do this. It’s to the point now that I am scared of him, he has shown me that he doesn’t care at all if he causes me pain physically or emotionally. He has everyone fooled and believing that he is a great guy and Father, I guess I just needed to voice my side too. I know that the Lord will show me the way, I will continue to pray for his guidance. Thanks for letting me tell my story.
Lost and broken 💔😭
Hey Cynthia, I’m so sorry that this happened to you. It’s not easy to leave someone toxic. You are taking the first step and that’s courageous. Hang in there.
Yes to be blunt. You’re wasting your time for sure.
Get. The. F@ck. Out. Now. She’s evil. Salvage the bit of dignity you can and grieve privately. She’s not concerned about your feelings. There’s zero respect on her part. Have enough self respect and self love to walk away and grieve on your own. Right now you are being a total door mat. No one looks at a doormat and says, “actually, no I don’t want to wipe my muddy shoes on that mat! I would rather be in a relationship with that doormat.”
Walk away….walk away …. don’t let her use you as a backup.
Jeff,
I find that writing my feelings is important. I can take baby steps to leave an unhealthy relationship. Identifying what I don’t like is the first step. I then start spending more time with people who respect my feelings and have similar views. The more I do these things, the more I can see the person and the relationship as unhealthy. As I continue to learn to love myself and give good things to myself, an unhealthy relationship loses its grip. No one has the right to make me feel uncomfortable, I must stop giving people permission to make me feel uncomfortable, and then it will stop.
Cynthia, so as I’ve been scrolling through these comments, yours is the only one I truly relate to in every way. I’m stuck in a marriage, seven years of betrayal & heartache and feelings of being broken and worthless. But I’ve always depended on his k financially because he won’t let me work and I don’t have much family support, and I have nobody where we live, except for being stuck in this stupid apartment miserable and hurting. I want to leave so bad but I don’t know what to do or how to .. I just wish I had a opportunity for money & a car. but without either I feel so stuck… I’m only causing myself more heart break the longer I stay..
In my toxic relationship I was made to feel totally insane. He would recall conversations we never had and made me believe they were true. He made me believe I said things that I knew weren’t right, but because he did it over and over, I began to doubt myself. I found myself thinking too often, “maybe he’s right?”. I couldn’t tell him I went out with friends, as he would kick up a stink about who I wanted to see and why. Everyone became his enemy and because I didn’t want him to leave him, I started declining invitations from friends. I was so lonely. He isolated me from my loved ones. I spent one night in A&E on a drip because of panic attacks he caused by arguing and because I had my phone off all night and couldn’t reach me, he assumed I was at some cheap hotel cheating on him with who knows who.
When I pulled the plug on this relationship he shared inappropriate photos of me with my friends, as punishment, as to him I was just a whore.
Girl, don’t let anyone treat you like this. It’s not right, it’s not nice and most of all, it’s not love. Don’t be afraid to break free from the cycle of abuse.
I’m in a similar situation, only when i feel ready to leave it’s almost as if he senses it and does everything in his power to get me right back to where he wants and then totally flips on me allover again.. This has been going on since december 26, 2017!
Same… it’s like they know we are just done and they put on the charm … ugh
I am currently in a marriage with a narcissist partner. Before I ever heard the word narcissist, I blamed myself for everything and thought that he truly loved me. But deep down, I knew something was terribly wrong I just couldn’t put my finger on it. He would break up with me then come back after 2 weeks professing his love for me and how he couldn’t live without me. This was in the beginning, before marriage, and I hate that I didnt pay attention to these red flags. I took it as he must really love me because of the saying “if you love something, let it go, if it comes back yours.” Man, did that saying cost me 14 years of my life. We are now married 5 years with 3 children together. Fast forward, a friend of mine told me to look up narssicim. And boom!! All of my questions were answered. Everything made sense. I then became more angrier realizing that he had just been playing a game with me and my emotions. That I was just simply nobody to him. I had given up friends and my freedom out of ‘love and respect’ for him. Meaning, I sacrificed those things to keep him at peace. He didn’t like for me to hang out with anyone else but him so to keep the peace in the house, I just did nothing! This has been going on before I found out about him being narcissistic but the realization of me becoming a hermit to satisfy him enraged me. I no longer conversate with him because 1st, everything I saw turns into an argument… 2nd, I now realize he would use everything I saw against me in an argument. Now that I found out about his manipulative ways, he wants nothing to do with me. He told me, in one argument, that he’d be willing to accept if I no longer allowed him to see his kids. Something I’ve never even said I would do and absolutely something I would never do. He waited til the next morning to say he didn’t mean it but deep down, I know he does. Now we are living in the same house as strangers. I speak up for myself and front fall for his bs. So guess what…now gets wants a divorce. I’m angry with myself that I didn’t have the guts to leave, mostly for financial reasons, but I also realizing this new tactic of his. Discarding me. I’m no longer beneficial to him. He knows he can no longer feed off of me so I guess I’m no longer good for him. I know God will make sure me and my children are taken care of so I will give him the divorce he is now begging for.
Hey Kiki, thanks for sharing your story.
Not many people have the courage to take the first step and leave a toxic marriage, especially with kids. But you did it. So no need to be angry about yourself not making the attempt earlier. You are a strong, brave woman that deserves a round of applause.
Best wishes and may everything works out well for you.
I just left my narcissist boyfriend 3 weeks ago, I was reading the comments above and everything you guys said in your relationship has happened in mine we have been together for 3 years and I should have seen the red flags in the beginning but choose not to, I felt like he was different and was just trying to love and help me, then A year into It ,he got abusive physically, emotionally,mentally pin me up against the sliding doors while he was drinking with his two friends that showed up, and only one of his friends helped me but the other just sat there and laughed. I left and he tried chasing me up his road barefoot saying I better hope he don’t get his hands on me again, I left! well a year later he was suppose to be going to anger therapy and stop drinking “, so I went back thinking it was because all the drinking he was in that mind set little to find out he wasn’t going to therapy at all, one day he would show up after work at our home drunk and I went to help him out of his truck to him pushing me and i was like I’m going to take me and my son to my mothers to stay till you calm down and he kept yelling who was I seeing, and that he wasn’t drunk but he smelled of it ya know. Everyone knows that’s smell. He made me feel so stupid even made me feel crazy at times, he made me start believe his lies he would make up about my self. I just wanted a family for me and my son then 3 years later we had his first son, his only kid, and it didn’t get better it got worse, he would say if we wasn’t going to be together he didn’t want any thing to do with his son, he even written out a paper and signed he didn’t want no contact and not visitation nor was he going to pay child support I got upset and started crying because no child needs that and ask that he just thought it threw and rip it up that he would regret it well he did and then two weeks went by I felt like we was doing better then I would ask to talk about our future and he wouldn’t go there but he kept saying I want to get married and I love you, I don’t want no one else but you, he would even say he wasn’t good with emotions and if I stoped asking question to ease my trust with him about stuff “I constantly got told that he was talking to women and flirting in public behind my back while I wasn’t aloud to go no where out side the house not even my mothers because he said they were no good and they did nothing but use me which wasn’t true, I even stop hanging out with friends because he didn’t like them that they were bad influences on me, but he could still hang out with his,I would confront him and kindly ask, not getting loud just ask to set down I needed to talk to him and he said he was tired of always talking he didn’t give two craps what I had to say or ask that he was tired of it, not knowing I was trying to get confirmation that he was being loyal to me and he would never give it to me, would sleep on the couch days at a time not talk to me or the kids and we lived in the same house. I didn’t know what else to do but just let him be,thinking he would come around well little to say he did but refused to ever talk about anything well now that I left and he is the one begging now, for me to come back saying he will do anything and that he’s changed his way and if I didn’t accuse him all the time which I didn’t I was just asking what I was constantly toad told by other women that I didn’t even know’ that he wouldn’t call me god awful names and put me down. Im not going back this time and I’m currently trying to get me and my two sons our own place and I can actually breath again it’s just a little hard being with someone and around them all the time to not being around them anymore, but this too shall pass right? I’m trying.
I was berated n lie to for 12 years n cheated on many times then i use to get blame for everything now one day me just move on then told me he move on i am happy i am out of the relationship i am at peace
I will say I am little bit I have been in some really bad relationships before I got bet up many times I put up with it for 11years but I got away thank God for that then I was homeless and loveing on the straight and yes I had to do some things I’m not proud of at all then I meat a great guy one day and we started to seeing each other and one day he told me he wish that I would get off the streets and I told him well u get me a home and with in pi ne week he had me a home but he never told me that I would never have to do what I was doing I should have just left then but it felt good having a home again and I feel in love with him bbn I love that man so much that I would have have gave my life CVup for him and that is the God honest TRUTH and I thought bbnour love would last forever I really did I have been with this man for over20 year’s and bbni am still in love with that man but he got a job as a truck driver and my hole world to up side down and I miss him so much when he was in training I agree that we had man like he was dead when everyone morning I woke up and I new that he had done me wrong I felt it in my heart and my gut but I just could not make meself to aseptic and my mother was dieing with cancer see I was going with him on the road right there at the end but I told him I’m we had to come home and he could fine a jod where he will be local and be home every day but now he didn’t do that he was really still going out of town the morning my mother died I beg him not to go but he was so determined to go and then the next thing I need he’s walking through the door my mother has passed away and this didn’t want to believe that he was running around ever since he became a truck driver and lasted almost four years before I really found out and he told me in a text he said that he only done it 3 time boy that was a lie he been doing it befor my mother passed away and I was just devastated because I still love me I’m home and promised me that you never do it again anyways sorry what are you doing crackhead digging and digging and asking questions he he so mad NFL not to take his wedding band off a battalion to see a girl from escort service the job and his got now he makes 23 dollars a hours and I told his boss man that he was doing it on there time but he my husband told them I was crazy because I told them I would have them shut down because I was paying my husband $23 an hour to cheat on me the name of the company is expeditors in Greer the trucking company off of Highway 14 63 years old I am 53 years old I’m still in love with you I don’t think you stop cheating on me he’s so secretive about anything I don’t know how to walk away he’s never put his hand on me are you so quick to hit me in a minute but yet I still love him I have no one else not down here on heart I want to go home I wish I could go to
I have been in a toxic relationship for 18 years now. My husband has been diagnosed with border line personality disorder. Our relationship was the worst for the first ten years. He physically abused me frequently and cheated every chance he got. Then it got to the point it was just verbal abuse. I am really not sure which is worse. They both feel about the same. We have four children, our oldest moved out as soon as he was of age because he was physically and mentally abused as well. I hate myself for not protecting my children better. I have left numerous times, but he always weasels his way back in. I constantly feel stuck with him. I wish something would come over me and I could just break free. Recently he moved out for several months. Since he has been back he has been so nice, but I have seen this all before. For those of you that have went through it, how do you finally break free? I am at the point that I have been through so much that I don’t care if he changes or not. I just want to find my way out with my children.
HHH, I can relate 100% my husband is the same way. He has BPD and he is absolutely horrible. No honor, no kind of respect, lies lies and more lies, repeated abandonment and yes cheating on me via online dating sites. It’s all been b’s from the start. I so wish I to get gotton out before saying I do. As for breaking free I’m keeping my own lil secrets these days. Saving my $$ even if it’s just $10 bucks here & there it adds up. I’m getting my ducks in a row and mentally preparing to remove him from mine and my children’s life for good! Good luck and God speed!
It says 15 signs to a toxic relationship….it takes two people to be in a relationship. All the references to the person that’s being toxic is the male. As if the woman is incapable of administering toxic behavior.
I agree!! Women can be equally destructive!
Hey my name is mike and I’m in a relationship with a younger person she is currently pregnant and I understand that she is younger than me so when I got with her I understood that I have to teach her growth and excuse her from certain things That she is bond to lack on me being her man and wanting her to grow should tell any human being that I am welling to sit here and be patient with u Nd show how to grow Nd show u that I’m ok with a lot of things u do but is the way u do it then when u do it the wrong way u get mad at me for feeling like I can’t trust you then IT causes a whole different argument Nd everything just escalates so quick Nd then some how she manages to make me feel like I’m but in reality all I do is try to show u the right way the easy way the way that we both gonna be happy but she always so defensive and think I’m ouT to get her But it’s no where near the case I wouldn’t dare to put a hand on her or go talk to another female when she gets me mad like other guys do I know she loves me Nd she does a lot of stuff for me that brings warmth to my heart and actually feel important but I just don’t understand why is ok foru to ask me to go about a situation a certain way but when I do it’s always a big issue like Idk wat to do I don’t want to leave her cuz of something bad we’re going throw it makes me still wanna stick around because to me permanent damage wasn’t done Nd if we can’t get through a Rainey day who do I expect us to get thru a storm ? But if she cheats it’s the only storm we can’t get through. I don’t want to Walk away cuz I feel like If I hold on for longer it’s a possibility it might work but wat if. I’m wrong Nd I just end up wasting more time and just end up hurting my self any advice?
I was in a 30 year relationship. He was my 1st love at 12 years old. I am 43 and left him. He never married me. Everything I have read about toxic relationships signs is spot on what my relationship was with him. I worked hard to fix myself and always made to feel it was my fault. I am just beginning to know what LOVE is. I am engaged and starting to live my life. I DID IT! AND I AM HAPPY AND I DESERVE IT. WE ALL DO. LOVE SHOULDNT HURT.
If you are in a toxic relationship, get out. Don’t stay, don’t make excuses. It can destroy your life. Don’t risk it.
Yes you should
We dated from January 2017-February 2018… Got back together November 2020… I fell for the lie that he had changed. I can’t do anything right… Claims he “doesn’t care” but talks about my past relationships & makes up these delusional actions & persona of me & gets beligerently mad when I won’t back down while I defend myself… Then of course, now HE’S the victim. I hate it so much…
i just got out of a 9 month toxic relationship and my ex told me he was going to kill himself because of me. then i talk to him a month later and he says he loves me. 2 weeks ago was the last time i talked to him and i have him blocked on everything. if i open up communication again, i know he will suck me back in. i doubt myself and how strong i really am, and i don’t feel good now, but i was strong enough to leave him and i know it will get better soon. it just hurts now- but i feel bad even feeling bad because i know he treated me horrible the entire time we were dating. seeing others support each other on here is helping. stay strong everyone xx
My husband makes me feel like Im not good enough. He doesn’t talk or communicate. I’m not allowed to tell my family anything about his life, even the little things like he’s participating in a 5K. He hates them. Sometimes he’ll hurt my feelings and 1/2 the time he pushes it off by saying it was only a joke. It’s to the point where I’m not motivated to do anything, even daily chores. Which only builds his resentment or frustration. I feel like I always have to do what he wants, instead of doing my own hobbies. If I felt like he emotionally cared and could show me how much he loves me then my depression would be less and I could do more for our relationship.
I would like to comment on the fĺact 3omen also are abusive to men but many men do not complain formally to anyone.
I see this almost daily with my employer who is a open heart surgery, cance survivor.
My employer is daily assaulted verbally and from time to time physically abused by his small and very yelling abusive wife.
Honestly, I do not know how my employer lives like that from day to day.
It is really heartbreaking to see this 70 year old gentleman squirm with embarrassment at the time his wife verbally assaults him in public places.
I have been witness to this scenario more than 3 times and it is the most unfair thing I have witnessed.
So please, readers, be objective and try to see this all fairly. For the unjust cometh in the likes you may least expect
“I was with a girlfriend for five years and was making plans to propose to her. Then one day, she said she wanted to take a break to figure things out. That was about four years ago. She got married about two years after her “break” to a coworker who I later found out through the help of hackgoodnesstech on insta, gram that she had been cheating on me with the whole time we were together. I was devastated at the time, but now I think it was all for the best. Also, it’s a small world, because her husband is cheating on her with my staff. Thanks karma!” I might just give my staff a promotion, what do you guys think
I’ve pretty much known my marriage was toxic since a couple weeks after our wedding, when the cheating first began, seven years ago. I know I need to leave and move on & I’m mad at myself for staying this long but when I go to leave, it’s just hard when you have nowhere to go and it’s been all you know for so long.. but I’m tired of hurting all the time. It’s an every day thing to this day catching him talking to other women & doing shady stuff behind my back. And I know I don’t deserve it because I’ve always tried to be the best wife I can be, I thought maybe I wasn’t doing enough, or wasn’t good enough so I would always try to be the best wife and its never mattered. I’ve come to realize that no matter what, he’s going to do what he wants to do. Period. It’s been hard to accept that he really doesn’t love me, and he’s not the person hes made me believe he was. I feel like I’ve wasted seven years of my life, but I know it only gets worse and I need to end this for good. I just have to figure out how to exactly…
It’s so scary thinking about being on my own again, but then again it seems so peaceful and I know that it’s what needs to happen.